Would saying good-bye to your therapist cause you trauma?

If you're looking for a therapist, keep these things in mind. 50 Signs of Good Therapy:

Would this be a tough decision? Have you prepared yourself?

Presently, I still require individual therapy from my therapist, for she has been the most successful in tackling the secrets and hurts that I’ve been holding onto for so many years. I remain needy to be heard and reassurance from her, so I will continue on for now, and for me at this moment, it’s distressing to consider parting ways, but I recognize that day will come and I will have to prepare myself for it.

How gruelling therapy is in the first place, and yet to be so secure with a stranger, to trust and disclose your most private inner thoughts, secrets, feelings and emotions; a person who listened to you when no one else does or ever did, never criticized, nor judged and was actually absorbed in what you had to say. It’s a reassuring relationship.

Many people with mental illness, for my depression and PTSD, seldom had encouragement or validation throughout the years, believing they or their lives weren’t important enough to be heard.

Now this person is looking at ME, asking ME how I’m feeling, and listening to my response.  She’s believing my trauma, how tough it’s been throughout my life, and most of all validating my emotions.

Beautiful ❤️: Some would argue we pay for this service, yes we do, however, to overcome problems with relationships, perhaps your job and improve mental health we have to seek professional help. Do you believe it would be difficult to leave?

When therapy is coming to an end, it’s been recommended to discuss it a few sessions beforehand.

Written and copyrighted by Deb McCarthy 2017

This article on ‘Finding a Therapist’ covers all therapy questions:

7 thoughts on “Would saying good-bye to your therapist cause you trauma?

  1. iwritedid

    Thanks for this post, again something to consider…Therapy is controversial and of course it is an artificial relation which is started artificial, hoping to find connection; in which also many people do not find what is described here, so not the understanding ear, or even prejudices or giving exactly the wrong response, showing it is not about you but e.g. about society. So the question you make is a very good question. In good therapy with strong emotional feelings, it would be tough I think, and it is very good advise you give to prepare this, in failed therapy afterwards you realize energy is lost (again).

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, in good therapy and especially with an experienced trauma therapist treating people with PTSD, it is effective and the chance for ‘attachment’ is there. The client overcomes this in time (in my case it took longer than expected), but you disclose such emotions from your traumatic past, and a therapist is there, a stranger, who is finally validating your feelings and anguish that should have been 30 or 40 years ago. Therefore, when the times comes to terminate, saying good-bye brings on another trauma. It’s very difficult to accept and takes time to grieve. Thanks for commenting and your thoughts are valuable. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I think about this often. Especially when trying to conquer the fear that he will abandon me first. But I really feel like when the time comes to part ways it will feel natural to do so. We don’t really want to have to be there in therapy, but if we intend to reach healing, I think a natural part of that healing will be to have gained the courage and strength and knowledge to know and to say we don’t need to be dependent on that relationship any more. It kind of gives me anxiety to think about not having such a significant part of my life no longer there…especially when he plays such a huge role in all the things you listed above right now that I have never had before…someone to listen, someone who believes, validates, and actually cares. Why would I want to walk away from that? I trust God will tell me when it’s time to move on and hope by that point, part of that process of healing was learning to trust and incorporate others into my life that could and will willingly want to contribute those things to my wellbeing, and me to them. I don’t know if that makes sense. I hope so.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It definitely makes sense. When you are in therapy for treatment of PTSD for trauma, you are sharing the secrets that have been hidden since you were a child or as an adult. If it’s for childhood emotional or sexual abuse, just think for a moment, you are meeting a stranger, a therapist who is validating your thoughts and feelings and believes what you tell him/her the pain and guilt that you’ve carried for years. For once in your life, you’ve let your guard down and trusted someone and proved yourself right this time and the therapist hasn’t failed you. Unlike other people in your life, they have, and now here’s someone you have to say good-bye to. Who would want to say good-bye? Sure, you have the tools to carry on, but you are now frightened to carry on without this person who has somehow been a kind of ‘caretaker’ (not in a sexual way) and has looked after you all of this time. Hope this makes sense! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. TradeRoutz livingStyle

    I’ve just moved far away from my psychiatrist. To say it’s kinda traumatic is an understatement. I don’t go to therapy, but rely heavily on my psychiatrist. It’s seriously not easy.

    Liked by 1 person

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