I’ve consulted a few therapists over the years, and it’s always been advised to “give it some time”, but just how long do you “give it”? I prefer not to ‘therapist hop’, however, even after a few sessions I can sense if this is the therapist for me. I’ve been with the therapist I have now for almost 6 years and knew almost immediately it was a ‘good fit’.
I found this article in Psychcentral.com interesting.
Advertisements
Having been on both sides of the couch I will say this … as a therapist I felt if someone didn’t like me, which always happens sometimes, that’s their perogative, and they are probably not going to be as comfortable working with me. I would never expect them to, although sometimes they didn’t need (to like me) and sometimes they grew to (like me) but often their gut-instinct that they did not like me for any number of reasons (gender/dress/appearance/age/accent etc) was valid and a reason to try someone else.
As a client, if I met a person I really didn’t like as a therapist I would listen to my gut instinct and not return. If I felt this happened a lot, I would question if it was anything unreasonable on my part or I set my standards too high to avoid doing the work. In the past the reason I did not like a therapist and did not return had more to do with a cavalier attitude, where they did not seem to care at all and were just going through the motions, I also didn’t like a couple of men because they were a bit leery. It does take time but I agree w/u that you should go with your gut ultimately. xo (great post!)
LikeLike
Interesting looking at it from both sides. I’ve often wondered what if a therapist didn’t want to work with a client. We are human beings, and although a therapist should respect people regardless of race, religion etc, how would that work? I feel a certain “not a good fit” from the first or second visit, however, I do give it a chance before quitting. For trauma work, the first therapist I had was inexperienced and caused chaos for me, and I believe she was way over her head handling PTSD.
Thanks for commenting. Hugs 🙂
LikeLike
I went through two very disturbing psychiatrists and two very strange therapists before finding the ones I like now. No use waiting money for something you don’t need. Thank you for the link
LikeLike
It’s difficult to judge if the therapist will it be helpful or not, and how many sessions will it take to find out. It also took a few therapists for me, including one who I thought needed therapy of her own, before finding the one I had for 7 years. It was an experienced trauma therapist that worked out in the end, and I recall from the get go that she was going to work for me. Thanks for commenting. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
I feel like the first visit usually tells a lot about whether it’s a good fit or not
LikeLike
Sometimes you can tell right away if something is not a good fit. Better to cut one’s losses fast and move on to something better.
LikeLiked by 1 person
It does take time to find out, yet the first visit does give a certain feel and you should go with your gut. Thanks for commenting.
LikeLike