It has taken me many years to begin to get a handle on where my feelings of shame, confusion, second guessing and low self esteem come from. I remember when I made it to addiction recovery for alcoholism, my Mother congratulated me but was quick to point out I was the only one with problems in the family (not true my elder sister had undergone psychotic episodes a few years before) and it was all down to me being in her words “difficult” and “a late maturer”.
I seem to have gone through my life with a huge backlog of grief over never really having my true self and feelings validated together with a huge impact of physical and emotional trauma from accidents and then the descent into addiction all in an attempt to cope. As my therapist explained it this week.
You were like a human canon ball being…
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