I read this captivating book: The Loveless Family by Jon P. Bloch, which described me and my own family to a T. This paragraph in the book really touched on a nerve, acknowledging how much harm my parents did, not believing me about the sexual abuse. The wounds haven’t entirely healed and dancing lessons, upscale clothing and oodles of Xmas gifts never swayed my painful memories.
From the book:
“Between children and adults, there may be lifelong disappointment over a child’s failure to meet the parents’ expectations. The child, in turn, may spend a lifetime fluctuating between guilt for having failed and having resentment for being expected to succeed in the first place. When parents failed to help when they could and should have – if the child was being sexually abused, for example, and the parents chose not to believe it – the wound may never heal, despite superficial niceties. Sometimes, too, parents resent never having had their own chance at success.”